Its weird. Larysa is a list curator at Bored Panda. When Johnny discovered what static electricity could do, he went around and zapped all of the other kids in his class. Well, is god in this weapon Im carrying? She asked, So Johnny feels stupid occasionally? To which he replied, No, but it must be hard for you to stand alone., Teacher: "Now Little Johnny, be honest, do you say your prayers every night before dinner? Up your conversation game with any of these 400+ riddles! #4. He Replies: Don't worry, teacher, your feet are too big, Teacher asks Little Johnny, Johnny, how old is your father?Hes as old as me, Johnny informs her.Now how would that be possible? inquires the surprised teacher.Well he became father the day I was born., At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." First, the men are sent out into the jungle to collect 10 pieces of any fruit they find. A Bit Longer: Good Jokes Jokes to Tell Your Friends Spoken Jokes. After a few days, his teacher calls up Little Johnny's dad to report that Johnny has been behaving badly at school. "Teacher: "Now, Johnny, who discovered America? His dad says to the teacher "Hang on a minute, I had Johnny at home with me for 2 months and I never phoned you once when he misbehaved. ", Little Johnny and Silly Billy were engaging in the time-honored tradition of a verbal battle like little boys all over the world. This comment is hidden. Reminds of the old joke about the mother with 6 kids. "Little Johnny: "I tried, but there was someone already there! "Little Johnny smiles.Teacher: "So what's so funny about it? ", Johnny: "Dad, have you ever been to Egypt? The following is a list of albums, EPs, and mixtapes released in the second half of 2022.These albums are (1) original, i.e. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." Johnnys friend'My bike went missing and it looks like your-it even has the same horn' Little Johnny looks at his father and says, Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?. Billy continued, No hes not! She says, "it's a donut." Then Little Johnny says, "give me fifty cents." Johnny gives her the used condom, and his sister gives him 50 cents. "Johnny says: "Back at home, looking for her ticket.". 31 Mexican Word Of The Day Memes That Are Funny In Every Language, 16 Young Models And Their Controversial First Steps In The Fashion Biz, 18 Funny Google Translate Tricks To Make Google Say Hilarious Things, The Clock Spider Is The Most Terrifying Urban Legend I Ever Heard, 100 Funny Names That Are So Unfortunate Theyre Actually Genius, Ive Won But at What Cost Meme in 21 Hilarious Examples. ", Little Johnny asked his grandpa to croak like a frog. "Little Johnny: "Jack, Queen, King. 138 of them, in fact! Teacher: "Does anybody know what we call a person who keeps talking when nobody else is interested? Just a normal day at school and the teacher asked little Johnny, whats two plus two? 64. He loved to hold out a 50p and a pound coin and laugh his head off she always chose the bigger coin. ", Little Johnny returns from the market with his mother. Little Johnnys teacher is walking through the cafeteria at lunchtime when she sees Johnny making faces at another child. Little johnnys dad asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees. ", Mother, Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, youll get kids who will be very naughty to you!. "Little Johnny: "Oops, so it was a canary that I squeezed ", Teacher: "Now class, stop acting silly and start behaving, god is everywhere you know. Here are some dirty Little Johnny jokes that are definitely rated-R and may be too hot to handle! "Johnny replies: "I got a ticket from my sister. "He replied, "I saw a great TV ad. The next week, the guy picks her up for their evening out dressed in a biker's black leathers. excluding reissues, remasters, and compilations of previously released recordings, and (2) notable, defined as having received significant coverage from reliable sources independent of the subject.. For additional information about bands formed, reformed, disbanded, or . Son: "Thanks Dad!". Little Johnny is being questioned by the teacher during a math lesson. "Little Johnny: "I don't know! "Little Johnny replies "You simply sit on your recorder sir". Looking for some conversation starters and icebreakers? Some of the older neighbourhood boys have been making fun of Little Johnny lately. Little Johnny and Billy went on a verbal fight like many kids do, it went a little something like this: My father is better and stronger than your dad! She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. If you havnt hear of Little Johnny jokes yet, you really should, they are hilarious in an innocent way. ", Teacher: "Little Johnny, how do you spell "elephant"? 40 Funny Apologies That are Worthy of an Oscar or Academy Award, 73 Funny Ways to Say Going to The Bathroom For Social Events, The 15 Most Unusual Strange Jobs In The World That Will Make You Say Huh, 31 I See Stupid People Memes That Will Make You Feel Better About Yourself, 25 Funny Words to Put on Bead Bracelets To Make You Laugh, The Hubble Space Telescope Allows Us To See How Cool Space Is. Dirty Jokes and Beer - Drew Carey 2000-03-15 We didn't really read the reviews (lesson one: ALWAYS read the reviews) as it was an emergency situation and we were really tired. So that way I can be just like dad. The teacher found this surprising because she didnt know he was a detective. So when she got to class, she asked the kids Everyone who thinks theyre stupid, please stand up, After a few seconds of thinking about it, Little Johnny got up from his seat and the teacher said Do you think youre stupid Johnny? "Teacher: "On one side? What about Mrs. Now we know whos gonna be left out of that will. Johnny said, well, he likes to cut people in half. She stood up and answered the roll call by stating, "My name is Suzy, and when I become a lady I would like to have a baby if I can, and I think I can. Cant argue with him there. His mother interrupted, asking where he had learned this way of doing math. Johnny responded. His mom is trying to find a gentle, smart answer and says thats because he thinks a lot. Johnny said, well, he likes to cut people in half. "Little Johnny: "Yes, teacher one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. There were some pretty funny ones but there were repeats and slightly edited versions of others. Little Johnny said, Easy. Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. "I will show you the answer now children," says the teacher as he looks pretty chuffed with himself. if not married to one another, that could be coincidenceand would explain the magicians half-siblings A science teacher wanted to teach her 6th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so she produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms. "Johnny replies "No Miss, but I hated seeing you standing there all by yourself". "Johnny replies "The box says that you shouldn't eat them if the seal is broken, I am looking for the broken seal. When it was Johnnys turn, the teacher asked what came after the number ten. Reggie Miller's Dance, Soda Choice, And Pre-Game Shouting Match. Your account is not active. !, Teacher: "What did they do at the Boston Tea Party? "Little Johnny: "About 8 kilometers miss. The first guy comes back with 10 oranges. A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. ", Because cats haven't knocked everything off the edges, Little Johnny: "Mummy, mummy, does a lemon have a beak? Johnny quickly said, No way. "Did you get that for your birthday?" He asked. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Head over to this list of conversation starters! "No!". English teacher asks the class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense., Teacher: "How much is half of 8? ", The class was told to paint a picture of cows grazing in a meadow.Soon, Little Johnny lifts a hand that hes finished and shows the teacher a blank sheet of paper.But Johnny, you didnt paint anything on it? says the teacher.Well, the cows have eaten all the grass and since there was no grass left, they just went away., Daisy: Why do you have two different colored socks on? Thats right Johnny, but you still counted your fingers behind your back, lets try this again, but this time put your hands in your pockets and tell me whats five plus five? Little Johnny's mother was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the bottle. Teacher: "What is an island? The Bored Panda iOS app is live! if she a bad cook. Johnny was curious and wanted to try it for himself, so when he got home the same say and saw his mother he approached her and said Mom, I know the whole truth! The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Johnny can go to the 3rd grade." 3. ", History teacher asks Little Johnny: "Where was the French English peace treaty from 1800 signed? "My grandpa lived to be 100!" "And what do you have to be to go there?" "Little Johnny: "We're not passing notes. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! The teacher asked the class to come up with a three syllable word and use it in the sentence. How do you get ten?Johnny replies, Thats because you may ask for a loan of eight dollars, but that doesnt mean youre going to get it!, And that's how banks operate (and make it impossible to buy a ), "And, Johnny? Little Johnny's instructor paid a visit to his family at their home. Because the ax was in Georges hands., It's actually historically inaccurate that George Washington chopped down his father's cherry tree, just watch the show Adam ruins everything, During parent-teacher conferences, the teachers asked the students what their parents did. Johnny tried to buy a toy car with monopoly money at the store. ", Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, Dad, tomorrow theres a special Adults evening at school. "Teacher: "Now go on from there. Principal: "What is 3 x 3. ", Little Johnnys teacher went to pay his family a home visit. He stares for a minute and then, thoroughly disgusted, shakes his head, And these people tell me I shouldnt pick my nose? Little Johnny opened his hand and counted 1,2,3,4 and said - 4 teacher? He said that if he hit the lottery, then he would have a secretary to answer the question. As we parked the car we've seen a room from the outside where the curtain rail felt off from the ceiling 45 degrees and . "Does anyone know how to put 2 holes into one hole? Teacher: Are you even paying attention, Johnny? So she asked, Why did you copy your brothers homework?. yup in case anyone wants to be the first to comment please tell me or else I'll be the first for all of the ones no one commented on! A science teacher wanted to teach her 6th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so she produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms. Later that evening as Johnnys mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. what are 4, 2, 28 and 44? For three days she asked us how much is two and two. Little Johnny said that his father is a magician. The next week, the guy picks her up for their evening out dressed in a biker's black leathers.